DoD Fitness

DoD Running Tank - I Don't Run Unless Chased - Anti-Cardio Athletic Shirt

DoD Running Tank - I Don't Run Unless Chased - Anti-Cardio Athletic Shirt

Regular price $29.50 USD
Regular price Sale price $29.50 USD
Sale Sold out

For the anti-runner who:

  • Only runs when absolutely necessary
  • Defines cardio as walking to the car
  • Believes treadmills are expensive clothes hangers

This running tank is for not running. Perfect irony for those who wear athletic gear exclusively for non-athletic activities. Great for looking sporty while actively avoiding all sports.

Non-running features:

  • Moisture-wicking for anxiety sweats about cardio
  • Racerback design (ironic, we know)
  • Lightweight for less resistance while not running
  • Bright colors so people see you not exercising

Distance covered: Couch to fridge, repeatedly.

10% of sales donated to Maui Strong - supporting actual athletes.

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