DoD Running Shirt - I Don't Run I'm Just Late to the Squat Rack - Fitness Humor Tee

For the 'runner' who:

• Only runs when the gym is closing
• Considers walking to the water fountain cardio
• Has a 15-minute mile PR (and that's okay)

This isn't a running shirt; it's an ironic masterpiece. Perfect for those who own running shoes exclusively for grocery shopping and believe the only acceptable running is running out of pre-workout.

Anti-cardio specifications:

• Breathable fabric (for heavy breathing after one flight of stairs)
• Athletic fit that says 'I might run' (narrator: they won't)
• Moisture-wicking for sweating about the idea of running
• Durable enough to survive years of not running

Recommended use: Wearing to brunch, Netflix marathons, or anywhere but actually running.

10% of sales donated to Maui Strong - supporting real athletes who actually move.